The Giant Metal Chicken

Seriously, folks.  A Giant Metal Chicken.

Check it out:

"And That's Why You Should Learn To Pick Your Battles"

(Thank you to author Dayna Hart for brining this to our attention.)

Silly Saturday - by Mark Hudson - "The Texan"

This piece needs a little introduction.  At a recent Prompt Group meeting, we played with a prompt from Ursula K. LeGuin called "No Punctuation."  The objective was to write a piece with absolutely no punctuation, from start to finish, as an exercise in understanding the role of grammar in our writing.  Her recommendation, if you can't think of something to write for the prompt, is to pick something with action such as the beginning of a battle or the first day of a large sale.

Mark Hudson, one of our regulars, read this poetic piece of alliteration and we roared by the end of it.  As you read it, try reading it out loud:  it'll make a real difference.  He added a few periods and commas, but we'll let him get away with it - you'll understand when you read it.  Awesome job, Mark!

I hope you enjoy! -A. Catherine Noon

"The Texan"
by Mark Hudson

The landlord told me that I had to get out the Texans were taking over the country and turning America into a giant Texas Tex the Texan was textin’ while I was reading a textbook, telling me to turn in the keys to his totalitarian tyrannical trickery I located the landlady and lavished a loud rant AND rave revolving around rent, reporting resentment about relocation referring to repulsive ricocheting ranch hands robbing me of my remaining rights. I tore up the lease and responded that my lawyer would love to list my loft locally, leaving limited love for the lone star local, letting a lobotomy loom literally left of the line between the legally loony and lost in limbo. Tex took a taxi to town to tolerate a timetable to tell me to take off to Timbuktu, and take my towels, tubs of books, toiletries, tapes and cds, turntable and toys, and try and take the turnpike to temporarily turn off and don’t trick or treat on the way to Tor’s techno-thriller table-top tournament. Slowly I turned, inch by inch, step by step, inch by inch, step by step, and told Tex to take his ZZ Top looking self back home.

Up In The Air

While the C-5 was turning over its engines, a female crewman gave the G.I.'s on board the usual information regarding seat belts, emergency exits, etc.

Finally, she said, "Now sit back and enjoy your trip while your captain, Judith Campbell, and crew take you safely to Afghanistan."

An old Master Sergeant sitting in the eighth row thought to himself, "Did I hear her right? Is the captain a woman?"

When the attendant came by he said, "Did I understand you right? Is the captain a woman?"

"Yes," said the attendant, "in fact, this entire crew is female."

"My God," he said, "I wish I had two double scotch and sodas. I don't know what to think with only women up there in the cockpit."

"That's another thing, Sergeant," said the crew member, "we no longer call it the Cockpit. It's The Box Office."

I knew it!

Silly Saturday - The Shelter Pet Project Ads

And for a good cause too. 

The Shelter Pet Project has a group of these on YouTube and they are all so funny. The cat ones are my favorite.

If you'd like to submit a post for Silly Saturdays, please e-mail tina@evanstonwritersworkshop.org.

Silly Saturday - All I want for Christmas!

I wanted to share this video, which I'm sure many of you have already seen.

Enjoy!

Tina

Silly Saturday: "Lessons from Crochet" (or "The Fable of the Old Woman and the Crocheted Dolls")

A man and woman had been married for more than 60 years.

They had shared everything. They had talked about everything. They had kept no secrets from each other except that the little old woman had a shoe box in the top of her closet that she had cautioned her husband never to open or ask her about.

For all of these years, he had never thought about the box, but one day the little old woman got very sick and the doctor said she would not recover.

In trying to sort out their affairs, the little old man took down the shoe box and took it to his wife's bedside. She agreed that it was time that he should know what was in the box.

When he opened it, he found two crocheted dolls and a stack of money totaling $95,000. He asked her about the contents.

"When we were to be married," she said, "my grandmother told me the secret of a happy marriage was to never argue. She told me that if I ever got angry with you, I should just keep quiet and crochet a doll."

The little old man was so moved; he had to fight back tears. Only two precious dolls were in the box. He thought she had only been angry with him twice in all those years of living and loving.

He almost burst with happiness. "Honey," he said, "that explains the dolls, but what about all of this money? Where did it come from?"

"Oh," she said, "that's what I made from selling the dolls."

A Prayer...

Dear Lord, I pray for Wisdom to understand my man;
Love to forgive him;
And Patience for his moods;
Because Lord, if I pray for Strength,
I'll beat the daylights out of him, because I don't know how to crochet.

Silly Saturday!

Here are 8 words that the internet loves to confuse. (Just don't be drinking anything while you're reading, or you'll risk choking.)

Enjoy!

Silly Saturday!

I ran across this video recently and liked the premise...okay I admit it.  I love Seth Green and he tweeted about it. :)

Remember, if you have anything you'd like to post for Silly Saturday send it to tina@evanstonwritersworkshop.org

Tina

http://www.tinaholland.com/



Silly Saturday!

Another great video I found on YouTube, anyone with cats can probably relate to this.

Please feel free to send in your silly letters, videos, etc for silly saturday by e-mailing me at tina@evanstonwritersworkshop.org and I'll gladly put them in the queue.


Tina
www.tinaholland.com

Silly Saturday: The God of Cake

For this week's Silly Saturday, I'd like to share with you the blog, Hyperbole and a Half. If you haven't stopped by for a peek, it's well worth a visit. Author and artist Allie creates posts that reflect her unique outlook on everyday life.

For today, I am recommending you give "The God of Cake" a read. You'll be glad you did.

And you'll never look at cake the same way again.

Silly Saturday

Get out your silly hats! Silly Saturdays are for those strange, goofy, funny things you see on the internet. Be curious, creative, but keep it PG-13, please!

For today, we have a video that's made its round of the internet, but is worth showcasing again.  Enjoy!